I feel...

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Hello all! I hope everyone's weekend is going well.

This post is something that I've been wanting to write for a while, but organizing my thoughts and words into coherent paragraphs proved to be a challenge. This post is about emotions. The one factor that makes our lives and stories unique. Some people are more open about their feelings and others are more reserved. As followers of Christ, we are warned about relying too much on our emotions. {Ephesians 4:26-27}, {Proverbs 29:11}, {Galatians 5:16-17}.

I don't know about anyone else, but for a while I used to read those verses and think that a true follower of Christ wasn't supposed to have negative emotions and should be reserved in any positive emotions. If something bad happened, "don't fret, don't cry, don't get mad, God has everything under control, just pray and move on with your life." If something really good happened, "good, but remember that there are bigger things out there." This was also amplified with how black women are portrayed in the media. Unmoved by intense situations, strong to the point where it seemed inhuman, and sometimes only caring about superficial things. So, I started to think that it was wrong of me to cry about something that bothered me, to feel outraged about an injustice, to feel lonely or even have a crush on a guy because my thoughts and focus weren't directed towards God.

So what did I do about this? I stopped relying primarily on the thoughts and opinions of other people and I made reading for myself what God says about the topic my first mode of action. Then I prayed and listened to people I trusted. No where in the Bible does it say that we are supposed to be void feelings or emotions. The problem is not the fact that we experience different reactions and emotions to different things, the danger comes when we let our emotions (negative emotions in particular) govern our actions without an effort to see things from a different perspective or without thinking on whether or not that action will bring glory to God. It's okay to feel angry, just don't let that anger dictate whether you or someone else gets hurt. It's okay to feel sad, just don't let it overcome you to the point where it holds you back from everything. It's okay to feel lonely at time, just don't let that feeling of loneliness label you. Our emotions make our experiences and stories well... our own.

God is not an emotionless God. The Bible states that we are made in his image {Genesis 1:26-27}. It also gives plenty of examples of God's emotions and why He felt that way. Genesis 6:6 shows about the grief God felt watching evil and wickedness among the human race unfold in the days after the fall of man and before the flood. Judges 2:18 shows that God showed compassion for the Israelites by taking care of them and staying by their side no matter who was in charge. Psalms 7:11 also shows that God feels anger. A righteous anger. Isaiah 62:5 talks about how God will rejoice over us when we commit ourselves to Him. In the garden of Eden before the Fall, we see that Adam's joy in finding a suitable mate causes him to exclaim, "At last!"{Genesis 2:23}. (Those of you out there in dating or marriage relationships can probably attest to that kind of joy and excitement.)

So, although I say this to everyone, my message is primarily directed towards Christian black women. It's okay to cry, to feel upset, to feel overwhelmed or to have days when you really desire companionship (if you're single). The über-strong, emotionless façade can stop. Don't be ashamed to admit how something truly makes you feel and don't let anyone tell you how you're supposed to feel. You are made in the image of the almighty, all-powerful, perfect Creator just like everyone else on earth. Just don't act rashly on the basis of your emotions or dwell on them to the point where it consumes you. Many times we do have to "let go and let God", but not without being real and honest about our feelings and emotions. Emotions come and go, but the results from our actions are permanent.